Running on Hope

You know, I think I'd rather watch these guys deliver the news each morning. Then, maybe it wouldn't sound so depressing.

Running on Hope from Douglas Sarine on Vimeo.

Poor Obama.

Fun Monday Economic Adjustments!

Wow...how many Fun Mondays have I missed? A lot...I'm sure! Sayre is this week's hostess, and she wanted to know what kind of personal changes we are making to deal with today's economic challenges! Well, believe it or not, most of the changes our family is making is due to Roger's influence. He is definitely the most frugal of us all.

I noticed the first "change" the other day...in dishwasher detergent. For some reason, I've always been a fan of name brands. Even when I learned in business school that many "off brands" are made by the same company and are the same product without the fancy packaging, I still gravitate toward the colorful boxes with the names I know. When I saw the $1.00 box of no-name detergent under the sink, I was skeptical. But guess what? That detergent works JUST AS GOOD as the name brand stuff.

I'm not sure this qualifies, but we are slowly changing out the bulbs in our house to these twirly things. It's conserving energy, which is important to our future economic survival, right? These bulbs are uber-expensive, so they had better pay off.

We have also eliminated some of our eating out, which we needed to do anyway. It's so much cheaper to prepare food at home, and we used to do it a lot more in the past. We are trying to revive that habit, now that cheer season has ended and our nights should be returning to normal.

Personally, I haven't gotten a massage since before Christmas. That's a big sacrifice, since I'm usually as tight as a drum. I still am, but the guilt about money spent on my tooth extraction has kept me from indulging.

I feel even more guilty that I haven't been able to come up with more "cost-cutting" ideas. Maybe it hasn't fully hit me that we are really in a recession. Or a depression. Or a free fall. I'm hoping the other participants have great ideas that I can borrow.

Speaking of cheer season, this weekend was a 'milestone' of sorts. The Offspring has been cheering for the past seven years. She tried out for the high school cheer squad (she will be a sophomore next year), and MADE IT.

NaBloPoMo Day Twelve - What Does Red Mean?

Day Twelve.

And the Palin interviews continue. It's strange to me that the RNC kept Palin AWAY from the media, in so many respects, and NOW she is on every channel. It might have behooved the Republican ticket if they had let the country see who she was BEFORE the election.

Or not.

Since the election ended, the analysis of the results has been frenetic...have you seen this map?

The colors indicate how 'different' things were in this election, compared to the 2004 presidential election. It was surprising to me for two reasons:

1) The vast majority - VAST - voted more Democratic (Democratically?) than last time.
2) One area of the country voted strongly more Republican than last time.

Guess where I live? Just pick the darkest red state on the map. Yeah, see?

An article in the New York Times commented on the reasons for this shift further right, in what is called the "Black Belt" of America.

I have my theories, especially having lived in the area for 16 years now.

I want to know what YOU think. Why did these states in particular lean MORE toward the Republican side, while the rest of the country shifted in the opposite direction? What are your theories?

NaBloPoMo Day Seven - First Dog?

Day Seven. End of Week ONE.

In the excitement that was Tuesday, I seem to have lost my bearings. Now that it is behind us, let's move on to more pressing matters - the selection of the First Dog.

President-Elect Obama promised his daughters they could get a puppy for their historical moving party. My mother and I had a discussion this week, debating the type and breed of dog the Obama family should acquire. Here's an idea of how the conversation went:

Mom: I think it will be something cute and fuzzy. Cuddly.

Me: Nah, they'll pick something stronger, Mom. Something with character. I'm thinking Beagle. Or maybe Heinz 57 mutt.

Mom: Now, those little girls are gonna pick something small. Something real cute. Poodle, maybe.

Me: Poodle? Are you kidding me? Obama wouldn't own a poodle!

Mom: But the girls get to pick. Not him. I think they'll go for something furry, like a Bichon. Maybe a Lhasa.

Me: Aren't ALL dogs furry?

Mom: Well, they DEFINITELY won't pick a German Shepherd or a Doberman.

(I'm wondering why she is thinking this, but don't ask.)

Me: I doubt he'll get a pit bull, either. It's not like he's Michael Vick or anything. Still, he might get a pound dog.

Mom: THE GIRLS get to pick. He won't have any say.

Me: I still don't think Michelle would stand by and let them get a wussy dog. I think a Labrador would be good. Clinton had one, right? Maybe a hound. I still think it will be a Beagle.

Mom: I'm TELLING you. It will be a small, fuzzy dog.

Me: Oh! I know! He wants to bridge the red and blue states, right? He should get an Alaskan Malamute! Female, if you get my drift! Right? That's a compromise, isn't it?

Mom (staunch Republican): NOT funny.

So, what do YOU think?

NaBloPoMo Day Two - Or Is It?

Day Two.

So, are you an election coverage junkie? Or are you just sick of it all?

Do you relentlessly check the various news networks, to see who is making the largest stump speech gaffes?

Do you sneak onto the computer, in the wee hours, just to play with the fancy electoral college magic map like John King on CNN?

Then you might have noticed this new feature:That's right, a few DAYS ago...get that? DAYS AGO, CNN began posting the number of DAYS until the polls close. Remember that they used to only do this on ELECTION DAY? Sometime in the morning, they would let us know how many HOURS until the polls closed. Now, I suppose feeling bolstered by the number of states participating in early voting, they have a countdown in DAYS.

I first saw this when we were 5 days, 23 hours out...I had to blink, reblink, and just laugh. It counts down...second by second. The news media has always astounded me with their extensive use of vocabulary in describing the same event using 42 different adjectives, but this? Oh, this was too good.

And I'm wondering about the chances of this REALLY being over on election night.

She Sends Me Email

One of the joys of parenting a teenager involves keeping up with their activities. It was easy when I was a child. All my mom had to do was peer into my room. Now, I have to monitor my child's myspace page, text messages, iPod, music downloads and emails. Not to mention all the other profile sites for which she has accounts.

The up side to this is that I often get text messages in the wee hours. Sometimes, I get them when she is spending the night at a friend's house. The messages are often heartfelt, and deal with subjects she might be mortified to mention face to face. I won't go into sordid details here, but suffice it to say at least she is discussing things we might never talk about if not for the power of technology. Things that are downright uncomfortable to discuss between a teenager and her mother, even with my reputation for being frank, open and providing T.M.I.

All this leads to an email I received from her. Halloween is her FAVORITE holiday, because she has the opportunity to dress in shocking attire. Here are some previous outfits: Halloween, 2005 - and yes, she totally had shorts on under that skirt.
Halloween, 2006Halloween, 2007

So I get this email entitled "just some suggestions as to wat i want for halloween", that states, in typical teenager fashion, "i kinda want to get that seductive victorian maiden sorta look...or a victorian doll thing...idk yet but i wanna wear a dress thats frillyish and dark =D." Followed by a photo of a $54 Tripp brand dress from Hot Topic. SEDUCTIVE VICTORIAN MAIDEN???? NOT. And to go with it? These: Adding insult to injury, the message continues: "also if u have read twilight....which is a no....well there are victorian vampiresses....and well that would be hot." And another photo to solidify the intent: HOT? The goal for Halloween is HOT? Sigh. I may not have read "Twilight," totally ruining my credibility as a worthwhile parent, but I DO watch "True Blood" on HBO.

I'm thinking...how is this Halloween different than any others? And exactly when did Halloween become an excuse to dress as a sexy vampire? In looking at costumes online, I became acutely aware of the options NOT available for purchase. Everything was a "Sexy Vixen" or a "Sexy Maid" and even a "Star Wars Sexy Adult Leia" costume (NOT the gold bikini, mind you). Even the "classic" women's costumes had titles like "Medusa the Mythical Siren." Since when did Halloween get so sexy? Let me hear from you.

Economic Conundrum

All this talk of a bank crisis, Wall Street panic, economic meltdown, Chicken Little "sky is falling" media buzz has got me thinking about my future financial plans. I need your help - FAST!

Since both of our vehicles have been paid off, I have been anticipating the release of the 2010 Camaro convertible (the coupe version will be released in early 2009). I had plans to trade in my car to get The Offspring a new ride in late 2009 (16th birthday) - something like a VW Bug. Or to better suit her personality, an old VW van - HA! At any rate, at the same time, as a little present for me...I was going to get the convertible. Now, before you all start thinking I'm going through a mid-life crisis, here is my logic:

1. How many times have you seen OLD folks in a convertible, and thought, "Those people are SO NOT HOT ENOUGH to be deserving of that car?"

2. I have worked hard. I deserve this car.

3. I would look darn good in this car.

4. As a little girl, I didn't have pictures of boys on my walls. (Okay, maybe one requisite photo of Shaun Cassidy.) I had pictures of cars. Concept cars, exotic cars, classic cars...I went to car auctions with my dad. Who better would appreciate this hot car?

5. I want to get this car before I'm so old that some teenager shouts at me in disgust, "That chick is SO NOT HOT ENOUGH to be deserving of that car."

6. I want an investment I can control. Who will maintain the car? Me. Not some lame board of directors or a CEO who will take the car on some boat to Switzerland to fraternize with his mistress. I WILL ADORE THE CAR.

7. I can't think of a seventh reason. Except I really, really, really, really, really (are you getting this internet?) WANT THIS CAR.

Okay. Time to talk some logic and sense into me. Or not.

Oh, wait, I did think of a seventh reason: I TOTALLY did NOT spend $5,000 per seat for the OPTION of buying season tickets for the Dallas Cowboys at their new stadium. So, I'm making sound financial decisions, right?

Let me hear from you.

Just in Time for the Season

You know, there are some friends in my life that I just CANNOT do without. One of those is the inimitable Brent. He recently sent me some GREAT shoe rules, and as you all know, I'm a shoe whore to the MAX. But these are PERFECT for the season - enjoy!

Just a friendly reminder, it's that time of the year again. Please raise your BIG TOE and repeat after me, as a member of the Faux Paux Sisterhood, I pledge to follow The Rules when I wear sandals and other open-toe shoes:

1. I promise to always wear sandals that fit. My toes will not hang over and touch the ground, nor will my heels spill over the backs, the sides and tops of my feet will not pudge out between the straps.

2. I will go polish-free or vow to keep the polish fresh, intact and chip-free, I will not cheat and just touch up my big toe.

3. I will sand down any mounds of skin before they turn hard and yellow.

4. I will shave the hairs off my big toe.

5. I won't wear pantyhose even if my misinformed girlfriend, coworker, mother, sister tells me the toe seam really will stay under my toes if I tuck it there.

6. If a strap breaks, I won't duct-tape, pin, glue or tuck it back into place hoping it will stay put, I will get my shoe fixed or toss it. No matter how much it hurts.

7. I will not live in corn denial; rather I will lean on my good friend Dr. Scholl's if my feet need him.

8. I will resist the urge to buy jelly shoes at Payless for the low, low price of $4.99 even if my feet are small enough to fit into the kids' sizes. This is out of concern for my safety, and the safety of others. No one can walk properly when standing in a pool of sweat, and I would hate to take someone down with me as I fall and break my ankle.

9. I will take my toe ring off toward the end of the day if my toes swell and begin to look like Vienna sausages.

10. I will be brutally honest with my girlfriend/sister/coworker when she asks me if her feet are too ugly to wear sandals. Someone has to tell her that her toes look like they've been dragged behind her car on the way to work and no sandal in the world is going to make her feet look good.

11. I promise if I wear flip flops , that I will ensure they actually flip and flop, making the correct noise while walking and I will swear NOT to slide or drag my feet while wearing them.

12. I will promise to go to my local beauty school at least once per season and have a real pedicure (they are about $15 and worth EVERY penny). I say spend another $15.00 and get a even better one.

And finally...
13. I will promise to throw away any white/off-white sandals that show signs of wear...nothing is tackier than dirty white sandals...

You go, Brent - LOVE YOUR HAIR, HOPE YOU WIN!

Are You Twitterpated?

Like I needed ANYTHING ELSE to play with, I discover Twitter. Instant gratification. Instant blogging from my cell phone. Instant addiction.

Perfect for those times that I am at home, and The Offspring is hogging the computer. Perfect for when I am nowhere NEAR a computer. I can do this FROM MY CELL PHONE and it UPDATES ON MY BLOG. Did you get that? CELL PHONE TO BLOG. In one easy step. Look at that sidebar - GENIUS!

I am so enamored with this new capability that if you gave me a choice between a lifetime without chocolate and a lifetime without Twitter? You'd be getting some really PMS-laced Twitter responses.

140 character snippets. Snippets of life. Like anyone cares? Oh, but they do.

I'm twittering, and jittering. As if text messaging didn't keep my hands occupied, now there is Twitter. Yeah, I'm late to the party. Yeah, I'm behind the times. Twitter has been with the world for almost two years - but hey, I'm a Neophyte, remember? I am the late arrival to ANY techno party that isn't playing thumpin' music.

Speaking to a live person, IN person, is the "old way" of communication. Are we all so self-absorbed that this is the new us? Updating everyone, at a moment's notice, with the minute details of our lives? I thought blogging was a bit narcissistic (which is why it is a good medium for me), but Twitter? It goes over the edge and beyond. Now, you can keep up with my latest Twitters in the sidebar. As if you really cared.

Are you twittering? If so, wanna follow?

Fun Monday Slogan Wear

It's that time again - when you are almost ALWAYS guaranteed that I will post! This week's Fun Monday Host is that snarky Aussie, Willowtree, so go visit his site for a list of participants. AND...he is a comment whore...AND he loves site hits. So visit more than once. His assignment was for us to show off some clothing art. That's tee shirts, baseball caps, hoodies, sports uniforms or any bit of clothing that we own that has interesting, funny or artistic graphics. This Fun Monday will take a LOT of time for those of you with slow browsers, so I'm keeping mine short.

I KNEW I saved this ONE t-shirt from college for some very special reason. At the time I wore this shirt, I was a shy, withdrawn, anti-social, prudish little thing. NOT!! Actually, every spring break during my college years, there was "THE SHIRT." The ONE shirt that EVERYONE who was ANYONE at South Padre Island, Texas, HAD to have. Spring Break of 1990? It was this gem, featuring mock-ups of Calvin and Hobbes on the front (two of my favorite cartoon characters):One the back? Well, LONG before The Simpsons were a big hit - Matt Groening produced a cartoon strip entitled, "Life is Hell," which I had discovered and become obsessed with. Guess who was often in the background of those cartoons? Bart, in a rudimentary form. In fact, The Simpsons had just premiered in 1989, so guess who the designers thought would be PERFECT for the back of this shirt?And that phrase? Well, "Drink until he's cute" was just a different version of slapping those beer goggles on. The "theme" shirts each year were so popular, that they guys' version was produced as well, but I don't have that one.

The Offspring has an entire collection, but I said I was going to be brief. So here's her favorite:And I couldn't find a photo of Roger in his "Old Dudes Rock Harder" shirt - which refers to MUSIC, you sickos...but this is one he's had for a looooong time. And no, he's NOT being sacrilegious here:Have a great Fun Monday - and watch this upcoming Wednesday for a big house udpate!

The Controversy Continues...

Just another quick post. I really have some cool things to tell you all, and I still have to finish my "tag" assignment.

But have to update you regarding this post. Evidently, Merck has received negative responses to its new Garadsil vaccine, and made this decision today.

To Gardasil, or Not to Gardasil?

I'm in a quandary, folks, and I need your input. Especially yours, swampy. I got into a lively discussion with my dear friend/twin sister (who happens to work for an OB/GYN) about the imperative need to inject my daughter with Gardasil, the new vaccine that, according to their official website, MAY help guard against diseases caused by HPV and some cervical cancers. (Guys, you have my permission to bail on this post now.) Texas will begin REQUIRING girls to receive this vaccine by the fall of 2008.

I am not "anti-medicine," but I am extremely leery of all the drugs that are pushed on today's society. Eating a bunch of crap that makes your tummy hurt? Take a pill so you can continue your gluttony! Only want your period four times a year? There's a pill for that, too! Look at the pretty green moth/sleep fairy! One night, I counted FOURTEEN different drug advertisements during two hours of television. What is going on? You can't open a magazine or watch television or surf the Internet without seeing at least ONE drug ad.

And what of the side effects? They rattle through the list like it's insignificant, but listen carefully and you'll hear horrible terms like "bleeding" and "stroke" and "liver disorders." Or maybe you'll have to wade through four pages of fine print to discover the hidden side effects.

Remember Vioxx? How about Norplant? Oh, and let's not leave out the Ortha Evra patch, which is now under scrutiny b/c of the serious health risks it has been found to cause.

Drug companies want to make money. And they don't always have our best interests in mind. I implore you to read this article before making your judgment.

Personally, I don't trust the pharmaceutical industry. I know that there are fabulous, life-saving treatments and medicines that work, and since my husband is a nurse, I am privy to personal stories of success. But can man really play God, and mess with our biological chemistry to this extent, in such a way that we are much better off?

At this point, I don't want my daughter to receive this new vaccine. It has only recently been introduced to the market, and no one knows what the long-term side effects could be. It MAY help prevent cancer - but what if the side effects create something worse? Please give me your input...

Does Anyone Else Think This is NUTS??

Or am I the only one? Surely by now you have seen the commercials for the Lap-Band. Right? Well, the very first time I saw one - I thought I was watching one of those fake Saturday Night Live commercials. Honestly. But these people are serious.

We all have heard of gastric bypass surgery - but here is a new less invasive procedure. They cut you open, put in this constrictive device, and then it can be controlled through a port to either narrow the opening to the stomach or enlarge it. Believe it or not, the system can be adjusted to accomodate a growing fetus. Which leads me to believe that doctors would have no problem implanting this in a pregnant woman.

I am NOT insensitive to those who are overweight. I have had struggles with my weight since I can remember. Eating just one high-calorie meal can add five pounds to my frame instantly. However, I have to wonder about these procedures that actually reduce the size of the stomach in order to prevent a person from eating too much. When you reach the point where you can no longer control your eating habits, isn't that more of a psychological problem than a physical one? Surgery is incredibly dangerous - and the effects are long-lasting. Is it really possible that some people have incredibly large stomachs, and that there is no other way for them to control their hunger? I'm not a physician or a psychoanalyst, but something about our society's acceptance of these types of procedures frightens me. I am concerned that people who undergo these operations will suffer long-term side effects.

We've all heard the drill: diet and exercise are the only way. And these are LIFESTYLE CHANGES, not short-term solutions. I would love to hear from any of you as to how and why you feel these procedures are the only way for some people to enjoy normal lives. I freely admit a measure of ignorance regarding this topic.

More Plush Treats

After reading Susan in Va's comment on the previous post, I thought, "Well, now, there ARE some more yummy little toys that you can give to your favorite child! Here, we introduce the Ebola Virus.

Yes, a virus you can cuddle with, but is resistant to antibiotics. Want something a little more...say...palatable? Try Mad Cow. Favor a more legendary plague? Maybe some Black Death is more your style.

If this is a little too adventurous for you, start with something simple like the common cold. Or maybe not a disease at all - just a small pimple you can squeeze in your sleep. At any rate, explore the Giant Microbes site for more ideas - remember, Christmas is only a few short months away!

Avoiding Today

Does anyone else find it odd that mothers are going to extreme lengths to NOT have babies today? Find further documentation of this weird phenomenon here.

I always was of the mindset that if you obsessed over something and feared it, you gave it power.

Another reason that today was (for me) just another day.

Not Just For Your Teeth Anymore

I expected the topic of anal bleaching to disappear from my brain cavity a few months ago. When initially I heard of it, I dismissed it as an urban legend. Then, a friend from California came to visit, shattered my illusion and verified the existence of such a practice in the real world (or at least in California.) Verbally verified, of course. Today, I was again faced with the reality of such a practice while reading The WOW Report.
Now, seriously folks, have you ever had a time in your life when you thought, "Is there any way of making my anus more pink or lighter in color? Mine is dark and I hate it." First of all, when is the last time you REALLY inspected your winkie? Your significant other spending a lot of time down there? No, forget it, I don't want to know. At any rate, being married to a medical professional, I hear it ALL...and believe me, they joke about everything (anonymously, of course) regarding the oddities of the human form. He often recovers people who have been subjected to colonoscopies. Never in my life has he come home to say, "Boy, you should have seen how BROWN this @$$hole was today!!"

According to Crappers Quarterly,which is a real online publication, "They use a special cream, combined with a full waxing treatment to achieve optimal results. The cream is concentrated and works 'with' the body (dark area) not 'at' it. It absorbs and penetrates into the skin and lightens from the inside out-slowly, but steadily." (Can you tell I did my research?)

I can only surmise that this is something the Brokeback fellas are into. Them, and porn stars. I just wonder how Crest is going to create a marketing campaign for their "new" Whitestrips.

Got Pants?

HOORAY! It's NO PANTS DAY!! (Better than acknowledging Cinco de Mayo, with all the unrest in today's America, dontcha think?) According to the official web site, which you can access here, "No Pants Day" is a day where everyone, be they students, respectable businessmen, or cherished community leaders, leave their pants behind. Usually this means wearing thick, appropriately modest boxer shorts, but bloomers, slips, briefs, and boxer-briefs all work as well. If you are participating today, you are invited to upload your photos to flickr.com, with the tag of "no pants day." And, when you access the official web site, you can view photos from previous events. My favorite has to be the gentleman in his shirt, tie, and jacket, standing atop a conference room table, pantsless. Taking "Casual Friday" to a whole new level!

I Am Grup

After a recent trip out with friends to a club, I was reminded of an article that I read about "grups." (Full text of this fascinating article here, with thanks to Mr. Big.) Pictured to the right is a couple in their late 30's, with children younger than my daughter. The author of this article has noticed a trend I thought was my own personal identity crisis - that many people my age "refuse to grow up." I am evidently not alone.

I joke all the time to my husband about how the nursing homes one day will be filled with the tunes of the Doors, Jimi Hendrix, and Led Zeppelin - as little old men in wheelchairs pester nurses for a spare joint. As the article suggests, that vision may not be far off. It seems as if more and more people in their 30's, 40's and 50's have kept up with fashion and pop music, breaking the cycle of "parents who just can't understand the music these days," thereby partially eliminating the generation gap. I listen to Bloc Party, and yes, they ARE better than The Bravery. My husband hangs his many guitars on our dining room walls. My friend, whiterabbit, still wears Converse. My daughter has just discovered The Cure and New Order...what's going on here?

The author claims it's our generation's passion for life, something I whole-heartedly agree with. In the closing paragraph, he states, "Being a Grup isn’t, as it turns out, all about holding on to some misguided, well-marketed idea of youth—or, at least, isn’t just about that. It’s also about rejecting a hand-me-down model of adulthood that asks, or even necessitates, that you let go of everything you ever felt passionate about. It’s about reimagining adulthood as a period defined by promise, rather than compromise. And who can’t relate to that?"

Awesome...totally. Now excuse me, while I go dancing.

Grills (Grillz?)

It's official. I'm old.

I was watching MTV with my daughter this morning, and as I'm prodding her to eat her breakfast, a song came on about "Grillz." For those of you who are not 25 and under, the new thing (thang?) in bling (blang?) is teeth.
I remember actually giggling whenever I'd see someone with a big gold tooth in their head - especially if it was a front tooth. Sometimes there would be a diamond inlaid in said tooth. I also remember HATING my braces in high school. I despised having a mouth full of metal. Little did I realize how "before my time" I was.

The grill above will set you back $1,400.
Want something cheaper? Try these:

All the big rappers are into these. Has the world gone insane? What's more, there is a new shop, opening in FORT SMITH, ARKANSAS, if you can believe it, that sells Grillz!

One good thing I've learned is that these are not like porcelain veneers - your actual teeth are intact. These are put on much like Bubba Teeth - except that you have to mold your own teeth, make a cast, and send them to the jeweler so they can customize your grill.
And here I thought Mr. T. was a fool, with all that heavy metal around his neck. This makes T look Tame.

I have to think twice now when someone says they have meat stuck in their grill.