Reposting a Literal Rant

Okay gang, I know those of you who have followed my blog for a while will recognize this as a previous rant - BUT - spelling errors are rampant on Facebook. I don't ask my FB friends to be particularly articulate for my humble sake - but I am beginning to wonder about our ability to properly communicate the written word. I don't want to believe that Americans are dumb. Reading and writing correctly are important indicators of our society's intelligence! Okay - enough of me and my soapbox...the word in question this time is "definitely." Now, this is a more complicated word than others I've seen butchered...so I'm going to repost a rant I made about a word that should be SO SIMPLE to spell, but eludes so many.

I've really tried to ignore the inability of some people to spell words correctly. I've tried to be understanding that not everyone was privileged to have the secondary education that I enjoyed. But the blatant misuse of ONE WORD IN PARTICULAR is very troubling to me...and I'm afraid that before long, no one will remember how to use this word correctly. It's the word LOSE.

Does anyone remember that word? Because I haven't seen it in a LONG TIME. Seems like people are "loosing" things a lot...and it's driving me INSANE.

So, quick lesson for you all: you LOSE something, which means you have misplaced it or got drunk the night before and flailed it asunder. You didn't LOOSE it...that word means to make something "less tight." Unless, in some strange event, you lose your belt after loosening it, then you are allowed to use those words in the same sentence. Just in that instance.

You are "losing" the battle. Oh, and we seem to have the spelling of the word "lost" down okay - can we maybe draw on that knowledge, to remember the base word has ONE, and ONLY ONE "o?"

You don't LOOSE an election - you LOSE it. I know it's tough, this English language, with all the bizarro rules. You are used to pronouncing the singular vowel in a word structured like "lose" with a STRONG vowel sound, right? It's got that "e" at the end, with that funky consonant right before it. So, it doesn't seem right - "lose" is one of those words that defies the rules.

But that's why I like "lose." It's unique. It doesn't follow the crowd. So, please, for the love of the poor word, use "lose," okay? Please?

Finding Balance

In speaking with a dear friend the other day, I realized that she and I shared the same dilemma: that of regaining our balance.

Every so often, life circumstances change in such a way that I find myself "off-kilter." The symptoms usually include bank statements that are ignored, haircuts that are overdue, dust bunnies (okay, full-grown rabbits) collecting in and around our bar stools, and the OMG moments when I realize I'm five minutes late to pick up The Offspring.

I tend to throw myself into every project that comes my way, and I am fastidious about keeping my commitments. Good traits, but daily responsibilities can often suffer as a result. Priorities tend to shift, and something always has to give in the end. That's one reason I haven't been blogging much.

However, blogging kept me thinking...kept me writing...and definitely made me more likely to use my camera. I miss it, and I miss you all - my blog buddies. My writing skills are important to me. I still cringe every time I see a misspelled word or a punctuation error (OCD, I know). So, I will recommit myself to this world that I had temporarily abandoned. For my sake as much as yours. Blogging is not and never has been a massive priority but something I have let slide to a point that I'm no long comfortable with.

To re-engage you, I ask: When have you found yourself to be out of balance in life? When have you had to rethink your priorities? And what did you do to resolve the problem?

NaBloPoMo Day 18 - Gettin' Pussed

Day Eighteen.

I can't believe I've made it more than halfway thru this challenge!

Now, before you get all wonky at the title of this post, it is NOT what you think. THIS is what the title refers to:
That is The Offspring with our cat, Whiskas. Whiskas has a habit of making herself comfortable upon any member of the family (and a friend or two) who sits still long enough to let her. We call this "gettin' pussed."

She will then purr incessantly, post-pussing. The worst time is at night, when I am her favorite victim. I like to start out sleeping on my side...and Whiskas will lay upon me, her body stretched along my side...her head on my shoulder. Sounds real cute, doesn't it? Well, it's NOT. Because the next step in the pussing is when she takes her paw, CLAWS EXTENDED, and snags my lips. No glass of warm milk or dose of Valium will allow me to sleep thru the torture. Not to mention the loud purring in my ear.

And when I turn? She doesn't budge. I have to turn and hoist her off me, and as soon as I am settled on my other side, she climbs back on. I've had lovers who were less clingy.

Sometimes, when I get into bed, she has already pussed Roger. Then I laugh and giggle that he is the victim, not me. Of course, he is usually lying on his back, with Whiskas on his chest. Still reaching for his lips, with that crazy paw. However, as soon as the lights are out, I get pussed. All thru the night, I toss and turn and shove and move that cat, and just like a magnet, she returns.

Purring and pussing - she is the reason I have bags under my eyes.

NaBloPoMo Day Eight - Irritating Phrases

Day Eight.

They say some of a blogger's most popular posts are RANTS...well, when I saw this topic on CNN, I KNEW it was rantworthy.

Recently the Plain English Campaign in the UK conducted a survey to find out their readers’ choice for “most irritating phrase”. Here are the results, in order of "irritation":

1 At the end of the day
2 (joint) At this moment in time
2 (joint) Like
4 With all due respect
5 To be honest
6 Touch base
7 I hear what you're saying
8 Going forward
9 Absolutely
10 Blue sky thinking

Hmmmm...yeah....you know what? I have some more things that irritate me. Here is my short list:

1. The use of the word "irregardless." It's not a word, people.
2. Text language. I can't communicate with my daughter anymore.
3. Usage of "also," "too," and "in addition" IN THE SAME SENTENCE.

So, what irritates you?

Remiss, but Making Amends

Long, long ago....in AUGUST, I received an award from one of my favorite bloggers: AOJ & the Lurchers. August. Did you get that? I am waaaay behind. How on earth am I going to get thru the blog-fest that is NaBloPoMo?

At any rate, MANY THANKS to AOJ & the Lurchers for this sweet award:

It originated with another blogger, RDH Mom. Why did I get this award? HA...b/c I "rant real good."

So, I need to prove I am deserving of the award. The topic: Last Minute-itis. The victim: Me.

Those of you with children will totally understand this. Those of you not blessed with the experience of raising a child, feel free to borrow mine for a taste of adventure.

Last Minute-itis means that somehow, I have to write a check for an insane amount of money, right before the teenager leaves the house for school that morning.

Last Minute-itis means I get a text message, asking if the teenager can run around town with another teenager, five minutes before I was supposed to pick said teenager up.

Last Minute-itis causes the teenager to mention that she needs a specific article of clothing, that is NO WHERE TO BE FOUND in our tiny little town...like at 9PM, the NIGHT BEFORE the event requiring the attire.

Last Minute-itis means that the teenager will need help on a complex subject like Geometry, about 30 minutes before bedtime, and after I have consumed a glass and a half of Pinot Grigio.

I know this is an "on demand" society - with all our fancy devices. I know that part of the fault lies with ME...The Enabler. I also am guilty of eye-rolling and the typical parental response such as, "WHY did you wait until the absolute LAST minute to tell me this?" And such response usually results in a prolonged argument that drives the male parental unit insane.

Is there a cure for Last Minute-itis? If so, could you share it with me?

Since I don't have one, I'm taking my only form of revenge: posting a silly photo of the teenager on my blog. For ALL to see. Hehehehe!

Literally Ranting - Again

I've really tried to ignore the inability of some people to spell words correctly. I've tried to be understanding that not everyone was privileged to have the secondary education that I enjoyed. But the rampant misuse of ONE WORD IN PARTICULAR is very troubling to me...and I'm afraid that before long, no one will remember how to use this word correctly. It's the word LOSE.

Does anyone remember that word? Because I haven't seen it in a LONG TIME. Seems like people are "loosing" things a lot...and it's driving me INSANE.

So, quick lesson for you all: you LOSE something, which means you have misplaced it or got drunk the night before and flailed it asunder. You didn't LOOSE it...that word means to make something "less tight." Unless, in some strange event, you lose your belt after loosening it, then you are allowed to use those words in the same sentence. Just in that instance.

You are "losing" the battle. Oh, and we seem to have the spelling of the word "lost" down okay - can we maybe draw on that knowledge, to remember the base word has ONE, and ONLY ONE "o?"

You don't LOOSE an election - you LOSE it. I know it's tough, this English language, with all the bizarro rules. You are used to pronouncing the singular vowel in a word structured like "lose" with a STRONG vowel sound, right? It's got that "e" at the end, with that funky consonant right before it. So, it doesn't seem right - "lose" is one of those words that defies the rules.

But that's why I like "lose." It's unique. It doesn't follow the crowd. So, please, for the love of the poor word, use "lose," okay? Please?

Back from LA

So, I made it back from LA in one piece...though I'm not sure LA will be the same without me.

The worst part of the trip? The possibility of not getting out of Little Rock on time. We were all on the plane, ready to fly to Memphis, when the pilot mentioned a wee problem. Some light was on that shouldn't be on - a malfunction of sorts. We were already on the tarmac, so I figured someone could hit a button, get rid of the annoyance and we would be on our way. No such luck.

After idling for a while, we were sent back to the gate, b/c evidently this is a SPECIAL LIGHT that only the GROUND CREW can fix. Too bad they took away our hammers during the security screening, or I would have saved ground crew the trouble.

Those with connecting flights (yes, that's us) were told we might want to exit the aircraft. After dealing with a few people at the terminal who were NOT so gracious about rebooking our flight and/or getting us to LAX, I was about to lose it. Finally, we are back on the plane, with no way to make our connection from Memphis to LA. Can you believe that they couldn't even book a flight out of DFW to LAX? Not after 6PM? Yeah - they were just wielding their power. Luckily, the airline held our connection, since there were 14 of us they didn't want to buy hotels rooms for that night...and we made it to LAX, albeit a tad late.

It didn't matter to me at that point, b/c after our ordeal in Little Rock and we were FINALLY on a plane to LAX, I found some in flight therapy:

Yeah, that's four drinks. You know, the planes are LONG, and who knows when the flight attendant might be able to return with that magical cart of beverages? It could be an hour or more, and I was NOT going to run out of therapy.

One day, we made our way to Santa Monica Pier, and just HAPPENED to wander onto a movie set...and just HAPPENED to see Eddie Murphy:In all my trips to Southern California, I've NEVER been that close to a celebrity. I could have TOUCHED the man, if I had wanted to be escorted out of the area in handcuffs.

Oh, and yes, I got to hold hands with Matt Damon:And as an added bonus, I took a train from downtown LA to Laguna Beach to see my mom and dad on Father's Day:I'll have more to tell about my adventures in coming days...but now, I gotta catch up on work and REST!

Fun Monday Jerkdom

What a great topic for Fun Monday, as given to us by Sauntering Soul! She wanted to know what kinds of things we do that make us JERKS! Well, I have a list - but most of the "jerky" things I do are unintentional.

1. I don't write thank you notes. I know, horrible. All the time, people do things that are special to me, and I think, "Hey, I should send them a thank-you note - right this minute!" And then I don't. The thought counts, right? Nah, I'm a jerk.

2. I drive like a jerk. Well, not the kind you need a cannon mounted on top of your car for, but the kind who does NOT abide slower drivers. Plus, The Offspring and I LOVE MUSIC IN THE CAR. So, those annoying jerks that pull up next to you, bass blasting as they scream along? Yeah, that's us.

3. And to be perfectly honest, I don't clean the cat box. Ever. Never. We have owned a cat of one kind or another since The Offspring was three years old, and I retched horribly the first time I tried to clean the cat box. And refused thereafter to go anywhere near it. So Roger has been the sole cat-box-cleaner, and I have continued to be a jerk in ignoring it. BUT...guess who has had the task these last two weeks? Yeah, I'm a double-jerk, b/c I could care less that Roger has passed the task on to The Offspring. She even has to wear a surgical mask to get thru it. HA! At least it's not me, the JERK!

Now, go visit the Sauntering Soul, and find out what jerks your fellow bloggers are!

Meme? What Meme?

You know you're a bad blogger when you take over a MONTH to finish ONE MEME. The Lovely Karina tagged me a long time ago to repost five previous posts, and how many do I have done? Two. Plus, I still haven't commented on all the Fun Monday participants, nor have I responded to all your thoughtful comments on my own blog. I suck.

But I'm catching up, and maybe Karina will forgive me. So, at the risk of getting even more google hits for "Urine Therapy" on my blog, I give you the following story, which originally appeared in August 2006, sans photo:

I'm gonna lie. So, now you all have fair warning. I'm gonna tell a lie for the rest of the day, into the evening.

I guess it's been a ton of stress that caused it - and I'm going to share the truth with YOU, the faithful stranger on the 'net - I have a growth. You can forget the photo, 'cuz it's not gonna happen. Basically, I have a THING on my chin - to the left of my bottom lip. What looks like the beginnings of an "innie-zit," know what I mean? Those zits that don't really come up to the surface? But you can feel them there - like the stranger in the dark, lurking around, ready to pounce...one of THOSE. A non-approachable, non-squeezable, can't-find-the-point-of-release zit.

Only I don't think it's a zit anymore. Usually, a zit won't make your entire chin feel like it's been pumped with Novacaine, or make the lip that is at LEAST an inch above it swell, giving you a lop-sided smile. I HAVE had the occasional throbbing zit, but this thing is like a facial fetus with it's own heartbeat.

I've been told, "It's a boil." I've been told, "It's a cyst." And I live in the South, so I've been told to put every imaginable pultice (poultice?) on the thing, even a remedy including urine that IS NOT MY OWN. Not gonna happen.

The Nurse/Husband/Father of My Child is concerned, but his treatments include lots of antibiotics, epsom salts and hydrogen peroxide. That just gave the "non-zit" lots of little nasty white things on top, but still nothing poppable.

I woke up thinking it would be better this morning, but alas, I have Quasimodo-lip. So I'm gonna lie, b/c I have to stand in front of a college class and teach tonight. Who wants an instructor with a BOIL, or a CYST or even a ZIT???? YUCK!

So...it's a spider bite. Pass it on.

English 101

I have a pet peeve, and it involves spelling. I have really begun to notice it more, as The Offspring is writing papers for school. I have to look them over, and make sure she doesn't use the words "u" and "idk" and "b/c" in her writing. You would be surprised how often I have to correct her.

But even worse, I think the 'net phenomenon, along with the rampant use of email, has hampered our ability to spell. As a child whose letters to my grandmother were proofread before they were sent out (my mother knew my grandmother had impeccable spelling skills), I have been raised to be meticulous about the written word. Here is your lesson for the day!

WORD: YOUR vs. YOURS vs. YOU'RE
If it belongs to you, it is yours. But no apostrophe is needed, as with the other possessive pronouns, such as "his," "hers," and "theirs." If you ARE going to do something, then use the contraction: YOU'RE. If you are in doubt as to which word to use, substitute YOU ARE in the sentence. If YOU ARE doesn't work, use the non-contracted YOUR.

WORD: LOSE vs. LOOSE
I admit that the English language is extremely difficult. No doubt about it. Usually, when you are faced with a vowel-consonant-followed-by-"e" combo, the vowel is long vs. short. The "a" in "ace," and the "i" in "ice" sound like the name of the vowel. But this next mistake pops up EVERYWHERE, and it annoys me to no end. If you watch television, you can save yourself. If you can't find something, you have LOST it. People write that they "loose" something, which makes me want to stab myself in the eye. You "LOSE" something - and then it is "LOST." Notice how each word has ONE "O?" Remember the show "LOST," and you will never spell "lose" incorrectly again. "Loose" has an extra "o" - and the way to remember this is that if your pants are "loose," then there is room for an extra "o." Same with loose women.

End of lecture. And if I've spelled anything incorrectly, I'm sure you'll let me know. I know this post is particularly snarky, but I'm just trying to raise my site hits to the level of the ever-snarky Willowtree.