Like I needed ANYTHING ELSE to play with, I discover Twitter. Instant gratification. Instant blogging from my cell phone. Instant addiction.
Perfect for those times that I am at home, and The Offspring is hogging the computer. Perfect for when I am nowhere NEAR a computer. I can do this FROM MY CELL PHONE and it UPDATES ON MY BLOG. Did you get that? CELL PHONE TO BLOG. In one easy step. Look at that sidebar - GENIUS!
I am so enamored with this new capability that if you gave me a choice between a lifetime without chocolate and a lifetime without Twitter? You'd be getting some really PMS-laced Twitter responses.
140 character snippets. Snippets of life. Like anyone cares? Oh, but they do.
I'm twittering, and jittering. As if text messaging didn't keep my hands occupied, now there is Twitter. Yeah, I'm late to the party. Yeah, I'm behind the times. Twitter has been with the world for almost two years - but hey, I'm a Neophyte, remember? I am the late arrival to ANY techno party that isn't playing thumpin' music.
Speaking to a live person, IN person, is the "old way" of communication. Are we all so self-absorbed that this is the new us? Updating everyone, at a moment's notice, with the minute details of our lives? I thought blogging was a bit narcissistic (which is why it is a good medium for me), but Twitter? It goes over the edge and beyond. Now, you can keep up with my latest Twitters in the sidebar. As if you really cared.
Wow - you guys are nosey little buggers, aren't you? Actually, it was pointed out that I never did explain the "Tiggerlane" portion of my blog title. Shame on me!
As you can read from the description above, it's a bit easy to see how a "Tiffany" could be dubbed a "Tigger." Add a passle of college buddies and a few pitchers of beer? Yeah - that's where the nickname originated. Bouncy, trouncy, flouncy, pouncy - fun, fun, fun, fun, FUN!
The "lane" portion? Very simple - it is my last name! And the reason I'm not shy about sharing this with all of you is that b/c of my business, my real name and photo are plastered everywhere.
Secondly, many of you asked how to do a strike-thru, and after a bit of research, I have found the answer. You have to use the word "strike" in the carrots, just like any other HTML coding...make sense? I tried to figure out how to "show" you the HTML coding here, but it just coded the dang sentence and struck thru it. But you know how to italicize and embolden text? Just use the word "strike" in the place you might put "em" or "strong."
I am SO glad to be back in time for Fun Monday this week. With all the packing and moving and working, I felt TOO absent from the blogosphere! Mariposa is this week's hostess, and she wants to know "what's in a name and what's on our plates."
As for the name - she is referring to our blog name. I am asked at times WHY I call myself "The Neophyte Blogger." Well, if you had any idea what it took to put together a post like this, by peering over my shoulder, it would be obvious. I have been on the 'net since 1996, but all these cool tricks that other bloggers can do with their sites elude me. I had to get help from Bond to put together the masthead you see above. I am an HTML idiot, literally - and I feel like a total newbie when it comes to blog design, etiquette, linkage, etc. I have tried a gazillion times to work with Photoshop - to no avail. I have to spend so many of my computer hours uploading photos and data to our company's real estate web sites that blogging is a foreign landscape. Even after all this time, I have to ask people like Willowtree how to do simple things like strike-thrus. So now you know - the real story behind the title of my blog!
As for my plate? Nothing is better than this:A big steaming heap of cheese enchildadas...they never get old. Must be the Mexican in me!
Now go check out the other participants! And Happy Fun Monday to ALL! (Photos of us in our new home, as well as responses to your comments, coming this week!)
See that? Over there....in the side bar. Do you know what that means? That means I've officially LOST it.
Me, the Tigger who posts at average eight times a month is going to try her hand at NaBloPoMo. I'm insane.
Now, I could write every day. Really. But CAN I? Can I toss The Offspring off the computer long enough to post? Will I have anything meaningful to say? I usually think of ALL kinds of things to blog about...when I'm in bed, awake, at 2 a.m.
But I'm giving it a shot...so bear with me. Now, on to more important things! Notice anything odd about this picture?Yup - the shingles aren't the same. A house glitch! Evidently, the roofing crew, who does NOT speak English, did this without the head contractor and their boss around. But no worries, our contractor chewed some butt, and now these eyebrow shingles have been replaced with the correct ones.
These dudes? They hang sheetrock:And though they are taking a break, here's what they had been up to:Jackie's crew also installed white posts on the front porch:They also poured the concrete for the driveway retaining wall:And LOOK! They finished the sheetrock, and now we are in the "mudding and taping" phase. This evidently takes a few coats, but the final coat of "mud and tape" will happen today. After that, the texture will go on.The next thing that will happen? Paint! Roger and I have looked at paint colors for WEEKS...and were overwhelmed by the names. We finally settled on "Brandy Cream." Isn't she hot?Nothing like a porn star, plastered on your walls. It will be okay, since we are balancing her out with "Simply White" on the trim and ceiling. So, the puritan and the harlot will be sharing our home. Should make for a lovely combination!
Before I begin, I have a big shout out to Bond at Bond's Big Leather Couch for the fabulous masthead you see today! Thank you, Bond, for helping out the Neophtye!
Janet is this week's hostess, and she let us VOTE for our assigment! The winner was "how we met our significant other," which in my case, wasn't under the best of circumstances.
I had just recently moved to this tiny town in Arkansas, having graduated from a 42,000-student university. I had grown up near Houston, Texas, and had only twice visited my uncle in this town, where he had a job waiting for me. My parents moved the same month to Laguna Beach, CA
My first month here, I auditioned and got the part of Anelle in the local production of "Steel Magnolias" - perfect for a newbie, and a way to throw myself into the community. I had broken it off with my boyfriend at college, but he refused to admit that distance would hinder our relationship. He wanted to "date" - and the play's opening weekend, he flew in to spend four days with me. The week of dress rehearsals, I had reached an unfortunate conclusion: I was NOT ready for country life. The nearest liquor store was over an hour and a half drive away, on long, winding roads - NOTHING like the straight and narrows of Texas. My job was NOT paying what my Bachelor's degree was worth. And my friends consisted of older women from work, who had nothing better to do than sit around and bitch about their husbands.
On Wednesday, October 20th, 1992, I had reached a total breaking point. I became distraught at the office, sobbing frantically, ready to change my life, even move to California. I had gone from the city life, where you aren't expected to look anyone in the eye - to a tight-knit community, where you are expected to know everyone's cousin's brother, and the names of all their children by each of their three wives/girlfriends. I just wasn't feeling it.
A lady at work took drastic action and dragged me to the house of complete strangers. She assured me that it would be okay - they had come from California and had adjusted just fine. I didn't want to go ANYWHERE, with my tear-streaked face, rumpled clothing and piss-poor outlook on my future. I couldn't even react as she tossed me in her car and whisked me away. As I was ushered thru their kitchen and out onto their deck, I vaguely noticed a man on the kitchen phone, engaged in a serious discussion. Hitching and sobbing, I was introduced to three strangers. A glass of wine appeared in front of me, and I sat there desperately trying not to weep and wail out loud while conversation floated around me. A few minutes later, the man on the phone joined us.I don't think Roger and I spoke five words to each other that night - after all, I was still a little addled and surely a fright to look at! After an hour or so, we all said our goodbye's. I made my exit by gracefully called the hostess' husband the wrong name - especially considering he was still wearing his work clothes with his name embroidered on the front.
I left that night with something tugging at me. After the play that weekend, and after convincing the ex-boyfriend that he was PERMANENTLY going to be an ex, my thoughts turned to the man from that night. I had been on some HORRIBLY disappointing dates during my stay - but something was intriguing about him. He wasn't like the men I had dated before. I had no clue who he was, but something told me I had to see him again. If for no other reason than to convince him I wasn't normally a blubbering moron.The next week, he called. I spent almost every night of the next two months with him. He was a musician - and 15 years older than me (he didn't look it). I wasn't sure about the age thing - but I was spending time with someone who was smart, funny, and a caring person - who was NOT looking for a serious relationship, much less a marriage.
When did I know for sure that I was going to marry him? I had my suspicions that first week, but it really crystallized when I went to visit my parents in December...the first week was okay, but the second week? HELL. Not b/c of my parents, but b/c I couldn't stand the thought of being away from him another second. The days at the California paradise seemed a prison compared to the frigid conditions of Arkansas with Roger. And here we are, 15 years later, happier than ever.
Now go read other sweet stories from Fun Monday participants, while I go vomit from the mushiness of this post.
Welcome to the BIGGEST FUN MONDAY EVER, with FORTY-NINE FIFTY participants, hence the title of this post!
Here was the assignment in voyeurism: I wanna see your CAR! It can be your current car, the first car you ever had, maybe your first new car with that new-car smell, a car you wrecked once, or even the dream car you would drive - given all the money in the world! Oh - and if you have a truck, SUV, lawnmower, whatever the local authorities allow you to drive, let's see it!
Here is what Tiggerlane currently cruises in around town, sporting the Century 21 front plate (they only require back license plates in Arkansas), and thumping the speakers LOUDLY - a 2002 Dodge Intrepid: Roger can't STAND things hanging from the rear view mirror - but I require them. On the left is what was an air freshener. Now that all the freshness is gone, I just like how it looks. In the middle is a present I got when I bought my real estate office - the key to success - get it? It's like my good luck charm. To the right is my naked man. I got him on a bottle of tanning lotion. One of my daughter's friends took our button-maker, and created the PERFECT face for him. Kinda like a child version of Truman Capote, you think?The only sticker on my car (another thing on vehicles that Roger doesn't like) is the one supporting Amber's cheerleading:For the record, my car just hit 50,000 miles. I bought it as a program car in 2003, and at that time, it had 16,000 miles on it. Now, before you criticize me for staying at home too much, here is Roger's ride:It's a 2003 Chevrolet pickup - and guess how many miles he has on it? We bought it brand-spankin'-new, and he just hit 9,000 miles. HA.
Now, go check out all the other fine participants:
Have fun looking at all the modes of transportation these bloggers have to offer! And if I have messed up your link, PLEASE let me know. Neophyte = pretty clueless about HTML. Also, if I missed your link, let me know, and I'll add it by noon.
Our wonderful host for NEXT Fun Monday, July 23rd, is none other than Willowtree at Once Upon A Blog. MAJOR thanks to him for hosting! And Willowtree, Mercy's Maid has volunteered to host sometime - so maybe you should tag her next!
Wow...so I'm the Fun Monday Hostess for the week beginning July 16th! Hold on, let me adjust my tiara...and now, I'm all a-wonder. Could this be the BIGGEST FUN MONDAY EVER?? You guys are blowin' the lid off this thing! HOORAY!
Of course, I managed to forget that Sunday, July 15th, is the day I ship The Offspring off to choir camp - which is three hours away. At least I'll have some time without her hogging the computer Sunday night to get my act together. And they probably won't have flutes there, which puts my mind at ease somewhat.
AND...you're gonna LOVE this...it's been raining for WEEKS here. What did I walk in to first thing this morning? Agents and staff, letting me know that WATER is seeping up thru the carpet in one of the offices. Carpet people come. I'm moving agents around the buildng. Carpet is being ripped up. I'm getting someone to suck up the water. Builder is giving me advice about how to treat the situation. And yes, I went to a dear friend's office for a minute just to break down and CRY, so I could GET IT OUT. A small malady in the grand scheme of things, but still - sigh.
But at any rate, in case you haven't HEARD the Fun Monday gig, I have a simple, fun assignment in voyeurism, should you choose to accept your mission (And I DO hope you accept, b/c I'm REALLY needing some FUN this Monday!): I wanna see your CAR! It can be your current car, the first car you ever had, maybe your first new car with that new-car smell, a car you wrecked once, or even the dream car you would drive - given all the money in the world! Oh - and if you have a truck, SUV, lawnmower, whatever the local authorities allow you to drive, let's see it!
Leave your name and/or blog address in the comments section, and I'll add you to the list.
This is SO GREAT - a plethora of bloggers are gonna be showing off their rides! Thanks for your participation - this is an easy Fun Monday for all, and I'm amazed at how BIG this Fun Monday Phenomenon has become - WOOHOO!!! If I've linked you to the wrong blog, please tell me - I AM a Neophyte here, and I'm nervous about messing this up.
If you're getting a little tired of seeing the SAME OLD THING up here - well, I've got a bonus for ya. Check out the painter, and watch the whole thing:
If you want to host NEXT Fun Monday, July 23rd, let me know!
During my D.C. visit, one of the most moving experiences was my trip to Arlington National Cemetery. As we celebrate this Memorial Day with our fancy grills, coolers full of beer and the blessed day off from the daily grind of our jobs, I realized that I will never again "see" this holiday in the same way. Even living with a Vietnam-era veteran on a daily basis has not made me appreciate the meaning of these holidays as much as walking through Arlington (sorry, Rog).
Believe it or not, witnessing the somber wreath-laying ceremony at the Tomb of the Unknowns brought me almost immediately to tears. Here, the Tomb Guards begin the ceremony:The Tomb sarcophagus is placed above the grave of a soldier from World War I. Three white marble slabs that are flush with the plaza mark the graves of unknown soldiers from World War II, the Korean War, and the Vietnam War. Advances in DNA techniques led to the identification of the Vietnam War Unknown. He was United States Force First Lieutenant Michael Joseph Blassie. Lieutenant Blassie's remains were returned to his family on Friday, July 10, 1998, and were buried in his hometown of St. Louis, Missouri, the following day. It has been decided that his former resting place on the plaza will remain vacant.I've often seen photographs of Arlington's rows of headstones. Similar to the one below, they only show a minute portion of the over 300,000 people buried there.While on a tour bus during my first visit to the cemetery, I shot some footage of the rows and rows of headstones. They seemed to go on forever. I couldn't figure out how to edit this video properly (neophytism), but approximately halfway through this clip, you will see what I mean about the vastness of the cemetery. Words cannot express my thanks to all those who have given so much in service to our country, as well as to those who continue to serve, every day.
How could I NOT participate when the host is a blogger named the Ice Cream Mama? She's an easy gal, and I don't mean that in a nappy-headed 'ho kinda way. She's assigned us QUESTIONS...which are always a snap for me. I either go for the truth, or total shock value, or both - which is usually as close to the truth of Tiggerlane as you can get. So...strap on your boots, here we go!
What is your favorite word? Love. (Can you see me sighing and grinning right now?)
What is your least favorite word? Smegma.
What turns you on (creatively, spiritually or emotionally)? MUSIC. Kisses. Truth. Passion. Intelligence. Laughter. Dang, were we supposed to do that in order?
What turns you off? Smegma. And horrible smells.
What is your favorite curse word? The f-bomb.
What sound or noise do you love? Vocal harmonies, blended into a symphony of voices. The sound of my daughter's laughter.
What sound or noise do you hate? Okay....the absolute WORST and most HIDEOUS thing....ugh. I can barely type. You know that kinda noise that makes your insides all congregate at your bellybutton? That sick, pointed type of auditory convulsion that somehow involves a connection between the ear and intestines? For me, that would be the sound of a pencil with a COMPLETELY WORN DOWN ERASER, attempting to erase.
Excuse me, while I go barf.
What profession, other than your own, would you like to attempt? Attempt? Uh...not attempt. SUCCEED at: Broadway performer.
What profession would you not like to attempt? Mortician.
If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? "Come on in, your friends and family are all here."
I wanted to participate in the Fun Monday assignment, but with my trip to D.C. starting tomorrow, I just don't have time to flesh out what my "perfect world" would entail. Love and understanding - yeah, but how interesting would a world be without conflict? I DO know that each and every day MUST include music, and appropriately, I've been tagged by Claudia - definitely sealing my spot as the slowest runner in the blogosphere. But this is harder than most, b/c I'm supposed to "come up with 7 songs I am currently enjoying." Like Claudia, I'm thinking ONLY SEVEN?!?!? Tough for a musical junkie!
(As you can tell, there are NINE songs on here as of late - so I failed another assignment.)
But what better way to leave you before I go on my blogging vacation? If you take time to check out all seven offerings, one per day - you won't even realize Tiggerlane is gone.
The first offering is typical "pop," introduced to me by The Offspring. It has a horribly catchy melody, and I was cursing her for an entire day at work b/c I was singing it to myself incessantly. It's a little naughty, and the first people that came to mind when I heard this song were Matt and Matt. The song is performed by Say Anything, and the title is "Wow, I Can Get Sexual, Too."
Lily Allen is one of my new favorites, and another discovery by The Offspring. This is the title track from her album "LDN," and this song makes me just want to bounce around the living room like a perky sprite.
If you read this post, then you already are familiar with this song. It's by Hellogoodbye, the band I'm currently obsessing over, as you can see from my new musical section in the right hand column. (Major thanks go out to Dan for being patient with The Neophyte and making that section possible!) The title is "Here in Your Arms." It reminds me of the more innocent days, when making out as a teenager was like the most AWESOME thing EVER!
Lenny Kravitz is one of my favorite musicians, and this track from the movie "Blue Crush" is entitled "If I Could Fall in Love Again." Lenny is sexy as hell, by the way.
Bloodhound Gang's members are actual friends of the boys from Jackass, and this is one of their tamer videos, "Uhn Tiss Uhn Tiss Uhn Tiss." I think I've been in this club.
You may not have heard of Shiny Toy Guns, but I spin this track at least four times a week. Driving rock mixed with techno, with a beat you can dance to, here is "Le Disko."
Lucky number seven is another group discovered by The Offspring, called Mindless Self Indulgence. She says I'm totally uncool for saying their name, b/c they are known to her as merely "MSI." The video for "Straight to Video" is a little odd, especially since I've never before seen a male blow-up doll. However, it's a good song.
Many of you will be surprised that I didn't include anything by Prince - my favorite artist of all time. He hasn't released anything in the last month, or it would be my current obsession. If you haven't picked up anything since his purple days, you have missed out on some great tunage.
Now, as a musician and an artist, I am compelled to keep an extremely open mind. That means putting aside judgment and taking the music and lyrics for what they are - and not being hypercritical of the message. This next song is a bonus, but it is VERY controversial. However, Nine Inch Nails has never been anything BUT controversial - and this is one of their best songs ever. I understand exactly what Trent Reznor is saying here in "Closer," but the more sensitive among you SHOULD NOT WATCH this video if you are easily offended. Or even if you are NOT easily offended. This is raw, sexual song, and some of the images are quite graphic. This is the undedited version, not seen on MTV, containing brief nudity and the f-bomb, in its literal use. However, Reznor's conflict is evident in the line, "My whole existence is flawed/You bring me closer to God." You've been warned.
That whole video reminded me of the movie "The Cell."
UPDATED SECTION: If you feel you got robbed, having to miss out on that last video b/c of content, let's see how open-minded you REALLY are. The Offspring was singing this to herself, and I about fell over. After watching it, I freakin' CRACKED UP! So, yeah, I'm a sicko, after all. This is from The Whitest Kids You Know, and it's called "Hitler Rap." Enjoy.
I won't return until April 2nd and will NOT have access to a computer or email - so wish me luck in D.C.!
I'm no longer a chiropractic virgin! I got popped for the first time yesterday, and although I was scared, nervous and panicky - it went pretty well! I made the appointment based on advice from my massage therapist, who was amazed at the tension in my back and neck (I'm sure frequent computer use and 4-inch heels contribute to that). She made sure I had two deep tissue massages before visiting the chiropractor. During the first visit, he asked lots of questions, took many x-rays, performed several motion/reflex tests, administered a TENS unit treatment, and stretched me gently. He also gave me a solid neck-popping, after I FINALLY relaxed. I have visits scheduled during the next two weeks to fully work out all of my "kinks." I am already experiencing increased range of motion in my neck, back and arms, so SOMETHING is working. If you've had any experience with bone-crackers, fill me in.
One of my claims to fame is the ability to recite the alphabet backwards. Guess when I learned how to do it, and why? As you'll see here, it can come in handy - but you still might get popped.
As you may have noticed, there have been some changes at the Neophyte's Lair. Most are blogger-induced, since I made the "big leap." Unlike the crowd who defected to typepad, I decided to stay with blogger. The change was okay - but I lost some of my hard-earned HTML coding. You have NO CLUE how long it took me to get the site looking like what you see here! I am an idiot when it comes to this web stuff.
The good news is that blogger is easier than ever. Photos upload faster, links are MUCH easier to add, post options are better, etc. Its functionality has made me feel more confident, and less like the computerland equivalent of Ree's retarded brother.
While you suffer thru my growing pains, check out this spoiled brat:
Okay, I was being mean and hateful, judging this poor little girl. Calling her names. After all, we never know the whole story, do we? It may LOOK like she lives in a mansion, and it may LOOK like she has everything she could possibly want, but we really don't know. So in order to be fair, I found her defense posted online. Watch, and make your own judgment. Just click on the video that says "I'm not a spoiled brat."
Want to know the real story behind the name of my blog? Well, this Christmas holiday serves as a perfect example. Since two holidays hit at once for the kiddo, we go all out. We bought her this little gadget, and now I'm as confused as Scott Bakula's character on Quantum Leap. Amber enthusiastically plugged it into our computer, and downloaded EVERYTHING - without reading the directions first. I was called for assistance and was about to knock myself over the head trying to find the "delete" button. After figuring out that you have to open freakin' iTunes to use the delete function (and not only that - there is NO MENU CHOICE for delete in the iTunes software) and PRESS THE DELETE KEY on the keyboard to get rid of songs after YOU CHECK THE TITLE IN THE ITUNES WINDOW...well, let's just say that the eggnog got a beating so that I felt better in the end. I had admonished the child repeatedly not to use the Santa Gift to upload content to YouTube that might put our family on Web Junk. My words were in vain. We didn't even start Christmas morning with the equipment (SD card or MiniDV tapes) to make the thing work. Luckily, I read the manual and was able to confiscate the camera (over protests from the offspring that she had used this type of camera ALL THE TIME in her media class this summer and KNEW ALL ABOUT IT and would you just PLEASE GIVE IT TO ME NOW and the stomping and oh-my-goodness-my-mother-is-an-idiot rantings) long enough to come up with a brilliant idea: use the SD card from her digital camera to at least shoot something until WalMart was open again. After the interruptions of a day at work on Tuesday, a birthday party involving 7 of her closest friends (and one boyfriend), and the curse of a vexing snot-monster inside my head that zapped my energy, I haven't yet figured out how to upload moving images onto our computer. The child is spending the night with a good friend, and left me with the SD card, videocamera and iPod, yet I only know how to upload photos and videos using her regular camera. Guess what gadget her father let her take to the friend's house? He was thinking clearly - but now, I haven't the energy to upload the software required to transfer video from the videocamera.
There are good and bad things about having a husband 15 years older than myself. The bad things include hearing phrases such as, "You've never seen that?" Good things include Roger's attempts to educate me so that I can catch up to his generation. And this education continued the other night as I watched the original MASH movie from 1970 - which was EXTREMELY FUN, given there was war involved! (Yes, I have one of those History-Channel/Military-Channel-loving spouses - who watches all war, all the time. I have yet to understand his fascination with this genre.) Also - cut me some slack - I was TWO YEARS OLD when this movie was originally released.
I loved the comedy and overlapped dialogue. I discovered how "Hot Lips" got her name! "Spear-chucker" makes sense! The daily announcements were hysterical! And, even though I might be committing some sort of cultural blasphemy here, I liked Donald Sutherland and Elliott Gould better as Hawkeye and Trapper John. The absence of a "laugh track" made the humor even better.
Next up: "Mommie Dearest" and "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest." Yeah, I know, you can't believe I haven't seen those either.
Okay -- so the blog hasn't changed much in the last few months. That's because I have absolutely NO CLUE about what to do to change it!
Hopefully, this horrible state of affairs will soon come to an end, as I have decided to slog through a web site tutorial to try to learn some HTML. Basically, I know two things: how to type a link so you can "click and go," and how to add a favorite link of mine to the sidebar. Sometimes I really have to think about the link typing, and it takes a lot of trial and error to get it right. (Remember, people, I'm in REAL ESTATE.) So as I go through some changes (which may foul this blog COMPLETELY UP while I am experimenting), please bear with me. Oh, and just to let you know, Roger and I celebrated 13 years of marriage this month. Here's a photo of my fresh, innocent little face, on my wedding day those many years ago, for your amusement.
Like I needed ANYTHING ELSE to play with, I discover Twitter. Instant gratification. Instant blogging from my cell phone. Instant addiction.
