Sunday, April 15, 2007

Neophyte Q&A!

How could I NOT participate when the host is a blogger named the Ice Cream Mama? She's an easy gal, and I don't mean that in a nappy-headed 'ho kinda way. She's assigned us QUESTIONS...which are always a snap for me. I either go for the truth, or total shock value, or both - which is usually as close to the truth of Tiggerlane as you can get. So...strap on your boots, here we go!

What is your favorite word?
Love.
(Can you see me sighing and grinning right now?)

What is your least favorite word?
Smegma.

What turns you on (creatively, spiritually or emotionally)?
MUSIC. Kisses. Truth. Passion. Intelligence. Laughter.
Dang, were we supposed to do that in order?

What turns you off?
Smegma.
And horrible smells.


What is your favorite curse word?
The f-bomb.

What sound or noise do you love?
Vocal harmonies, blended into a symphony of voices.
The sound of my daughter's laughter.


What sound or noise do you hate?
Okay....the absolute WORST and most HIDEOUS thing....ugh. I can barely type. You know that kinda noise that makes your insides all congregate at your bellybutton? That sick, pointed type of auditory convulsion that somehow involves a connection between the ear and intestines? For me, that would be the sound of a pencil with a COMPLETELY WORN DOWN ERASER, attempting to erase.

Excuse me, while I go barf.


What profession, other than your own, would you like to attempt?
Attempt? Uh...not attempt. SUCCEED at: Broadway performer.

What profession would you not like to attempt?
Mortician.

If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?

"Come on in, your friends and family are all here."

20 comments:

Pamela said...

now you did a "f-bomb"ing good job with this lovely post.

You know I need to go google that one word you hate. I'm wondering if it has something to do with whales. I'm just guessing.

I have to agree with your sound/noise. I should have written that. I used to love to sing with my family.

Pamela said...

okay I googled it. I was close.
It would take four/skin/divers to find it on a whale. ha ha ha.

not funny, huh.

M@ said...

Isn't it spelled "schmegma?"

All the redneck kids used that word on the schoolbus back in the day to describe these straight-haired hos....

I hate that word, too.

M@ said...

I'm sorry the other kids picked on you, Tigger. ;)

dodo said...

so far on reading these monday posts only you and I would have our name in lights!

Schmoop said...

F-Bomb....Damn Straight, Cheers!!

The very nice man said...

So you won't like my favorite swear-word (Smeghead) then??
Heehee, I liked your rants about the noise you hate! Well penned!!

Tiggerlane said...

pamela --- WHALES!! LOL!! Well, I suppose those ladies who are too large to thoroughly cleanse...sorry to gross you out!

matt - I spelled it right - but I like your interpretation! Sadly, my hair suffered from '80s styling, and I was a nappy-headed ho. Didn't start straightening it out until about 5 years ago.

dodo - We should be stars!!!

matt-man - My most recent and greatest accomplishment was going three whole days without dropping the f-bomb. But that's a story for another post!

Erik - THANKS! And you know, I am going to have to use your term on someone now. I had NO IDEA!

Rachel (Crazy-Is) said...

I didn't even like reading about the whole erasing with no eraser thing! Ugh!

Noelle said...

Smegma is a word I haven't thought of since elementary school, and that is indeed a good thing. Yuck!

Anonymous said...

So, you and I had several similarities here, even if they aren't the things I wrote for my FM post. We began the same way :).

You had me giggling throughout for the most part...I like a good jolt when reading a post :).

Pamela made me giggle, too. Comments are such a fun part of blogging, huh?

Amy W said...

Thanks for making me cringe with that hateful noise!!

Anonymous said...

You keep saying "smegma." Dang, woman! It's like you're a nurse or something.

I don't think I'll share with you what we used that word to refer to when I worked in the ER.

Nope. Would not be nice.

Molly said...

I admit to looking up smegma too.I am not sure that I have ever heard anyone actually say smegma. I am not even sure how to pronounce the word. Oh well, we will probably hear smegma twelve times tomorrow.

Tiggerlane said...

rachel - I still can't read it now. Gives me shivers.

noelle - Sorry to bring up the gory past. Hope you won't be too frightened to stop by again!

robin - Glad you enjoyed - and yes, gotta love Pamela's comments. I think comments are the BEST part of blogging.

amy w - Now that I look back on it, several things in this post are cringe-worthy. Sorry.

stephanie - Oh, c'mon. Surely it's the same use of the term? Seriously, how many more uses can the word "smegma" possible have? (Want something really gross? Look up the photos on wikipedia.)

mjd - Ignorance is bliss, at times. It's pronounced just as it looks, with emphasis on the first syllable. "Smeg'-mah." You can linger on the "mah" part, for effect.

Claudia said...

Ok, I had to look it up...eww. gross. as you had said, ignorance was bliss.

Kila said...

Smegma is a new one for me. You expanded my vocabulary today ;)

Yes, I can picture you on Broadway.

Bethany said...

Uh, thanks, I think.


Smegma! A blast from the past!

Beccy said...

You had me on tenterhooks reading the noise you hate, then you gave me shivers down my spine, yuk!

Tiggerlane said...

claudia - I knew people would be too tempted to resist looking it up.

kila - I'm an avid promoter of education! :-)

bethany - I wonder why that word isn't utilized today? I'm sure the kids have a new, more disgusting name for it.

beccy - I haven't heard it in years, but I literally get chills and a funny taste in my mouth when I think of it.