Thursday, August 03, 2006

Snakes on a Plane, AKA Vacation Day One

It's been almost a year since our last flight, so I was anxious to see what might have changed security-wise. I was hustled to the side with my "suspicious" bag on my last trip, so I was pleased that the little airport in Fort Smith didn't put us thru much hassle. One flight to DFW, then another to John Wayne in Orange County for 4 hours of total flying time. No sweat. A couple of airline safety talks were the highlight, as the announcement of what actions to take in case of a "water landing" always crack us up. Roger turned to me during this portion of the airline spiel and asked, "Did you see any pontoons on this plane?" I also enjoy their euphemistic reference to your seat cushion as a "flotation aid." I prefer, "The Oh-Shit Pillow."

We did have one minor incident on our last leg of the flight. Roger had to visit the facilities while the flight attendants were serving drinks. On his way back to his seat, an attendant was backing down the aisle in front of him, oblivious to his repeated verbalizations of, "Excuse me." When it appeared she was about to back over him and trip, he gently placed his hand on her back and repeated his line. She whipped around and said, "Don't touch me!! After 9/11, we are extremely sensitive to people coming up behind us and touching us!" I barely heard this, as I was getting up to let Roger back into our row. She started babbling to me about how inconsiderate people can be, and how flight attendants have to deal with so much these days - semi-apologizing for her outburst. All I could focus on was Roger seething with embarrassment. He felt she was inappropriate, and I agree. And has anyone noticed that the flight attendants aren't as hot as they used to be? I calmed Roger down by noting that the attendant who had committed the heinous act was old, fat, ugly, and had over-bleached hair.

After picking up the rental and checking into our kick-ass resort in Dana Point, we followed Mom and Dad back to their house in Laguna Beach (5 minutes up the road) for some of the largest hamburgers I have seen in my entire life. I wish I had a photo of THAT to share! Watch for the photos on my
fickr site!


Pioneer Woman said...

Oooo, I would have been so embarrassed for your hubby. Sorry! Those dang sensitive airline attendants.
Welcome back to the real world. Your family is BEAUTIFUL!

Humble Beginnings said...

I applied to be a steward for Air Canada but I was told I was too good looking and thin.

SongBird said...

Can't believe you didn't take a picture of those dang burgers that caused so much worry and concern!!